:: say that again?!! ::

Just as I was browsing through some stuff, this woman comes up to me and asks me for money (donation raw). Honestly, people like them annoys me.

Lady: Dong, pwede ka ba magdonate, kahit coins lang.
Me*laughing secretly*: Sorry, wala eh.
Lady: Sige na, di kasi toh para samin. *wow, ang kulit*
Me: Wala talaga eh.
Lady: Dong, Kahit coins lang, sa church kasi toh. *so? di naman ako pumupunta sa "church" nyo*
Me: Di po ako "dong". *returns to what I was reading*
Lady: Ay, di ka man pala lalake. Sorry. Kahit coins lang. *magsosorry na nga, sisingit pa yung limos*
Me: *taking out my 10 peso coin and handing it out to her*
Lady: Salamat. God Bless you.

It's nice to hear someone telling you that May God Bless you, but in this case I'm having doubts whether it's just what she automatically says to people and stuff. Hayy. This has really kept me going here, hasn't it. That was the second time around this week I've been mistaken for a guy. First, was this other lady who asked me to accompany her in crossing the street *my friends teased me as Boy Scout tuloy*. I obliged naman, pero natatawa ako. And she didn't even bother to take a very good look at me, she just kept on blabbering about how afraid she was to cross the street. Then this lady who asked me for some money.
I hate people who ask for money, acts all poor and looking so sad. It doesn't work for me. Because I've instilled in my mind that if you give anything to them, better not money but rather food which can actually help. Who knows right? They'd use the money I gave them for solvent, syndicates or even drugs/cigarettes. Now, are you being helpful? It's better to give than to receive right? In this case, doubts are inevitable.

-------->
This here, is part of the H and D story. Since some people have been asking me what really happened. I'd just tell it bit by bit.

I've mentioned in my previous post that H was really mad at me when we got our communication back right? That, I was not expecting. Since, I thought na magiging masaya that way. Na walang makikisingit sa kanila. I avoided any confrontation regarding that issue kasi baka ano pa masabi ko. I don't want to be the reason for fights and stuff, mind you.

Then, there was this one night where H got drunk *just by sipping half a cup of beer ha*. H asked me something na naikwento sa kanya ni D *my best dude*. Curious lang raw siya kung totoo nga ba raw yung nagkakacrush ako sa kanya. Being the dork that I was, sabi ko "Yeah, pero noon lang yun." I clearly said that. Then from there, I don't know what else we talked about pero nauwi sa pag-amin nya kung bakit galit na galit nga siya sa akin. Turns out may gusto din pala siya sakin. And ineexpect niya uunahan ko si D sa kanya. Little did H know, I had vanished from then on. I can still recall that night where H and D had this fight, and I found out it was because of me. Eh naisip ko na nung di kami nagkaayos *yung walang communication*, ok na ok naman sila. They had their own fights. Pero this got me thinking that I better change things back to the way it was before. I told H na di na niya muna ako makakausap for a while. And that's what I said and di na ako nagrereply sa mga text niya. Tawag pa nga ng tawag, pati si D kung ano ba raw pumasok sa isip ko at ganun nanaman raw ginawa ko. I didn't answer any of their questions. I simply went quiet. Then when I got home, tumawag si H. Stupid me, to forget that H already knows my home number *stupid talaga*. I know na umiiyak na siya that time. Kasi pag umiiyak yun, nahihirapan huminga. Anyway, the last thing I heard was H saying "Manhid ka." Tinawanan ko lang siya and hung up. I wanted to keep things that way. Kung san ako'y nananahimik. Pero ang kulit talaga eh, nagkikita kami sa tambayan and it's soooo awkward *inside*. Aalis lang ako bigla. I did everything I did before.

Ok, that something I had with H? ganito kasi yun, after what happened, I told them everything was ok na. And during those talks on the phone. We agreed to keep "our" relationship a secret to everyone. Pag nagkikita kami sa tambayan, the regular hampasan lang and kurot *how sweet noh? with all the colorful pasa pa*. I told H na kung pwede lang wag niya ipamukha sakin yung maghaharutan sila ni D. Ang tanga naman, magtatanong kung nagseselos ba raw ako. Who wouldn't? And dinidiin niya na I'm not that serious with what we had. Dinidiin rin niya yung mga na-link sakin before. I had it with H's doubts and nagging. I gave up. I didn't want to be in that relationship with H anyway. Magsaya sana sila.

Did I love H? Do I still love H now? I liked H. My ego's just hurt because of what H did. Now? No, I just have that feeling of you know. Yung pakiramdam na sayang, H would've been mine. But then again, wala naman akong mapapala sa kanya. So it's not a big a loss anyway.

This is what I feared. Blogging about THIS! Hayy, my readers deserve to know. ^_^

------->

Had 14 kills !! Wooooo! And I used Chaos Knight (Nessaj). Cool! Never thought that my hero's that cool. Though nang-aagaw ako paminsan ng hero. Eh kasi naman, *drama mode*, I'm sick and tired na laging ako ang inaagawan ng hero. Huhu! :P

*bow*

This is how I spent my Saturday night.